The Biggest Battle is Against Myself

I have to be honest.

The past few days haven't been my best in this whole quest. For those of you who don't know, I have lost nearly 90 pounds since Jan. 1. I was about 310 pounds then, and I have gotten as low at 217. 

The bad news though? At today's weigh-in, I faced the harsh reality that I am up to 229. Why? It's pretty simple. I have been eating like garbage recently, and after eating so much, it will end up catching up to you.

My tipping point was yesterday. I had eaten Kashi for breakfast at around 8:30 a.m. After that, I had meetings to explain the new Patch to various influencers. After my last meeting at the Merrick Library, it was 2:30 p.m. and I was starving. 

I fell into lazy mode. It's not hard to fall into the doldrum. Lazy mode leads to bad decisions, and I made a poor one when I decided to not get out of the car and pull up to the drive-thru at Arby's in Bellmore.

I looked at the menu and honestly debated pulling out of the line of cars and driving away. That would have been a big victory. Instead, I succumbed to the pressure, and I ordered a turkey, bacon and cheese sandwich (which was huge) to go along with a small fries and diet coke. I felt pretty gross after eating that.

The bottom line? I need to toughen up. Despite weighing 229, I have no plans to go into the 230s. In fact, my ultimate goal is to get down to 200. Can I do it? Yes. Do I want it? Yes. Now, it's up to me.